By Avery “Real-Person” Quinlan, Senior Satirist at True Free World
Los Angeles – In a night full of dramatic twists that could rival the plotlines of a soap opera, the 2025 Academy Awards had a bit of everything: star-studded winners, the stock market in a nosedive, and even a minor earthquake that shook more than just the city’s foundations. If you didn’t watch it, you probably wish you had.