Long-form deep dives into topics we have no business investigating; conducted recklessly, reported questionably, and published bravely for your enlightenment or confusion.
The Absurdity of Pointless Studies: A Satirical Take on Researching the ObviousIntroductionScience is a noble pursuit — and so is satire. When the two meet, the results can be breathtakingly useful, or they can simply confirm what your grandmother, your barista, or anyone with eyes has known for decades. Welcome to the delightful world of...
Hilarious Fake Research Findings on Everyday Mundane Activities: A Satirical Look at Unnecessary InvestigationsIntroductionEver wondered what happens when researchers put on lab coats, grab clipboards, and apply a generous sense of whimsy to life’s smallest mysteries? Welcome to the wonderful world of satirical news and fake research—where serious methodology meets absurd premises and comical studies...
Why We Studied Toast: A Satirical Look at Ridiculous Research into Ordinary ThingsPublished: TodayIntroduction: When Curiosity Becomes Comically PreciseImagine a world where teams of highly credentialed scientists convene in sterile labs to answer life’s most pressing—yet entirely trivial—questions. How many times must you tap a vending machine before it obeys? What is the coefficient of...
Officials confirm the failures are real, the timing is suspicious, and no one was emotionally prepared for this.
WASHINGTON — Federal authorities announced the launch of a new late-night investigation after discovering a nationwide pattern in which critical systems, appliances, and personal resolve consistently fail at approximately 2 a.m.
Officials confirm the slice is always gone, no one admits responsibility, and everyone feels strangely betrayed.
WASHINGTON — Federal authorities announced the formation of a new task force Monday to investigate a long-standing national mystery: who keeps eating the last slice of shared food and then pretending it never existed.
Officials confirm pens function independently until the exact moment they are all needed.
WASHINGTON — Federal authorities announced Tuesday the launch of a formal investigation into a long-standing mystery affecting offices, homes, classrooms, and government buildings alike: why every pen in a given location stops working at the same time.
Officials confirm millions spent, zero socks recovered, and morale “critically low.”
WASHINGTON — A newly formed federal task force has been officially assigned to investigate one of the nation’s most persistent mysteries: who keeps leaving one sock behind every single time laundry is done.
Officials confirm the time is gone, no one remembers spending it, and everyone is mildly offended by the implication.
WASHINGTON — A newly formed federal task force has been assigned to investigate a mystery plaguing Americans across all demographics, income levels, and calendar systems: where the time actually went.
WASHINGTON — A federal task force has reportedly been assembled to investigate the unexplained recurrence of the number 67, despite officials admitting upfront that there is “no evidence it matters.”
Experts demand answers about a number that has never done anything wrong.
In a move that has confused mathematicians, exhausted analysts, and deeply concerned at least one guy on Reddit, an international task force has launched a formal investigation into the number 67.
